Qualifying the Called part 1

“God doesn’t called the qualified, he qualifies the called”

God called me. I listened. Having someone who had just graduated from LDC 2, knowing very little about how the whole staff thing worked at camp, it was my time to be used.  With my staff shirt and lanyard on, I was ready, or so I thought. I had eight girls in my cabin and I had thought I had a great group of girls who wanted and desired to serve God with everything.  I was wrong. I did an activity where the girls would write on a piece of paper where they would go if they were to die that night and also write why they would go there. I read them the next day and stared in amazement as I read the slips of paper. Half of my girls had blatantly admitted they knew they were going to Hell. How does one even respond to this? Prayer was the only thing I could do. I knew from that moment on, I could not be the one doing the work through the girls, but the Holy Spirit. This week I wouldn't be about talking about boys, self image, or beauty, but going back to the cross. On Thursday of that week, after the Chample I had planned a time where the girls could write letters to themselves which I would send to the girls sometime in the school year. I told the girls that with their permission I would read them. The next day I read them and I saved a girl in my cabin, Emma’s last, I had no reason why I did, God just had me read it last. Her letter brought me to tears. Here’s a girl who just four days earlier had said she was going to Hell, now has certainty that she’s going to Heaven. Here’s what the letter stated: “Emma, When I see you again during the school year, I want to see you a changed person. I expect to see you a 100% true follower of Christ. When you receive this letter again, I want you to think back to when you wrote this letter. I don’t expect to see you sitting alone by yourself because people thought that you were weird for reading your bible, but I want you to see you talking to kids at (her school name) about God. Remember the verse; Philemon 1:6- it states that you should be ACTIVE in your faith so that you have a FULL UNDERSTANDINGin every good thing we have in Christ. Remember when Jesus kept asking Peter if he loved him, and Peter said yes then Jesus asked him to feed his sheep, but Peter kept ignoring the question or like when David defeated Goliath was 10 times bigger than him. I Believe in you, Emma, so do whats right, and commit your life to God. Go on a short-term mission trip and help those in need. Stop being stubborn, even if it hurts. Stop lying to other people, and repent of your sins when you know that you’ve messed up. 2 Corinthians 5:21 – “God made him who had no sin to be sin, so that in him, we might become the righteousness of Christ. Jesus died for your sins, not just Gages, but yours too, and everyone elses too. Psalm 145:3-4 God’s Blessing, Tears started to stream down my face and I couldn’t stop praising God. He was a work through Emma’s life. I may have not been qualified to any standards to be a counselor at Lake Lundgren, but when God calls, I answer. 

Uncovering Proverbs 16:9

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." -Provers 16:9 

Leaving behind my internship in Madison for camp was easily one the the easiest decisions I had made this summer. Lake Lundgren Bible Camp has been the core of my relationship with God and the true glue which made this relationship possible. For twelve days a group of seventeen teenagers were challenged while working with elementary school students and encouraging them in their walk with the Lord. God was so evident those days it was completely radical. One of the biggest things God revealed to me is that I needed to be at camp. For like a long time. My heart during those weeks were devoted solely to God and he told me I needed to be a camp for the remainder of the summer. The only problem was Madison. My life was there and I just couldn't walk up and leave, it wasn't possible. With the passion for camp ministries alive in my heart, I prayed that God will reveal His plans for my life through my mom. I couldn't make the decision on my own and I just needed God to speak through my mom. On the last day of camp my mom and I decided to surprise my sister and the rest of my youth group in St. Louis, Missouri for the Christian and Missionary Alliance Envision Conference. The nine hour drive throughout the late night brought me to tears as I told my mom about wanting to be at camp. She told me I had to talk with my pastor in Madison, which only made sense. But I asked her, what do you think I should do? She told me if your passion is at camp and if Gods leading you there, you gotta go. After she said the simple statement, I looked out the window of our Hyundai and couldn't believe the words she had just said. With tears streaming down my face all I say is "God you are so cool." I knew that God wanted me at camp, but I needed to talk to my pastor. He was completely supportive of where my heart and passion laid. The hardest person I had to tell was my room mate, Briana. She didn't want me going to camp for such a long time and be stuck by herself. I told her I wasn't coming back to Madison and literately it was only a God thing that she was beyond excited for my endeavors. God is so cool. I'm heading up to camp Monday morning with my best friend. I thought I had my summer all figured out, but God ultimately led me into a whole different direction and I'm thankful I'm only following Him. 

I took a walk

I took a walk today. It's amazing what can happen when I slow down and just walk. It's weird, I'm a runner so walking isn't typically what I'll do on a Saturday morning. But honestly, it's the best thing I've done in a long time. I've been sick the past two weeks, and working out is the last thing I would want to think about, but this morning I had to bite the bullet and get up and get out. Needless to say my body was still too weak to run any distance. So I walked. Walking was hard for me to do, not physically of course but mentally. I'm a runner, I don't walk, walking's for the weak. As I began to listen to my body and just walk, I turned on a sermon from my church when Pastor Jeff Brown came and spoke. Jeff is the superintendent of the Christian and Missionary Alliance, and when I started to listen to him speak, I enjoyed my walk. One of the statements he made was a quote from Howard Hendricks, a professor at Denver Seminary who passed away in January, it was this:
"I would rather fail, then succeed at something that doesn't matter." Such a powerful statement. It's amazing how often we as believers find ourselves getting caught up in the world and just trying to "succeed" but how much of that is eternal? Are we placing all our time and energy into something which doesn't truly matter? I failed at running today, big time. But by the walk I took, I succeeded eternally. I was able to stop, take a step back, and listen to the Word of God. Take a walk.

Redefining Good

Living Proof

Saturday, March 16th, 2013

 

I remember being asked my freshmen year “If God is a good God, then why is there bad in this world?” I didn’t reply, I had to question the thought myself. Every day we can turn on the news and be hit with the headlines of natural disasters, school shootings, and innocent lives taken away, where is there possibly good in those situations? Romans 8:28 explains, “For all things work together for the good of those who love Him.” It’s hard for our human minds to comprehend how good can come out of tragedy, but God promises good does come. Maybe what needs to change is how we define what “good” means, our perspective. I recently had it put this way, say you’re in a room; brick walls cover one wall while windows are on the other. You can look at the wall and explain how it is brown, rigid, repetitive, boring. Then, walk over to the windows and see fresh snow, smiling faces walking into the building, sun shining bright. You are in the same room, but seeing the room in different perspectives, one dark and one bright. Could “good” just be a perspective? I watched the movie To Save a Life recently and I watched how a student of the school takes his own life. Where is good in suicide? The main character of the movie used his childhoods friends suicide to change his life, to take no second for granted and for his mission to be a disciple of Christ. Now, what if the suicide would have never happened, would the main characters life be radically changed? There was a good in the death. I look at my life in hindsight and I know Christ worked everything for good. Every wrong road I traveled down brought me to where I exactly needed to be. I use how God has worked in my life and encourage others not to do the same. If it wasn’t for my personal struggles, I would not be to the place spiritually where I am today. God used it for good. As believers, we know this life will not be easy, but we can hold onto the promise that God will always intend it for good.  

 

 



Indulging

Living Proof

Thursday, January 10th, 2013

 

 

First off I just want to saw Happy New Year! My hope and prayer for you is that 2013 can be one where you look back and say, “I made it, and did it with the attitude of Christ.” Of course there will be mess ups, but God is forgiving and will not give you anything you cannot bare (1 Corinthians 10:13).

            This year already, I have been giving great thought about the topic of Gluttony, kinda weird right? Gluttony is described at the indulging of too much, whether its alcohol, clothes, technology, food or whatever you may be indulging too much of. For me, this sermon stressed the question, “why are you eating?” Do we look for comfort in foods? Do we eat simply because we are bored? Most people can say they look for food as comfort when we are going through a tough time. It’s no surprise we hear about people on The Biggest Loser who gained hundreds of pounds after a dark time in their life, they looked to food for comfort. But shouldn’t we run to God for that? Can God really help us to stop over eating or ultimately cure our hunger? I believe he can. Jesus spent 40 days and nights without food in a desert, God helped him through it. When he was tempted –with food- he used scripture to rid his temptation (Matthew 4: 1-11). If it could work for Jesus, why can’t it work for us? Pray about it. Ask yourself right before you’re about to eat that huge brownie right before bed, “Do I really need this?” Probably not. So pray, and ask God to help you overcome the temptation of food.

             For years I have always stressed the importance of self confidence in girls, and embracing true beauty. It was my platform for pageants. I was against eating disorders and would often write papers about their effects. It was time I started taking my own advice. I wrote this on March 28, 2011 for my LDC application: “Eighth grade was great, I was able to be myself except for one thing; I was convinced that I was fat. It drove me crazy, I tried eating less, tried to become a vegetarian, exercised a lot, but nothing was working. Seeds 2010 woke me up, I believed a lie. Satan told me all these things, which I believed too much. Trish Propson was one of the speakers that week at camp. She completely changed my life, I was able to realize that I was trapped in the cage covered in lies and I couldn’t come out, she helped me and the rest of the Seeds team to let go of our lies and burn them. After I did that, I felt so good. The burden was lifted off my shoulders, I was set free. I have now realized that God created me for a propose. I am a daughter of Christ.” This lie still drowns me. I look back to when I wrote this and I wonder why I lost this truth in my life. I found this app back in October called Lose It. It’s an app where you can track how many calories you have consumed in one day. I became so addicted to it. I set my limit at 1,324 calories a day, which was supposed to help me lose two pounds in a week. It was easy. I kept this up from November till now. I quit eating certain foods, and when I would indulge in “bad foods” I would work out insane amounts to try to burn off all the calories I had consumed. I obsessed over every little thing I put in my mouth. If it went over on my app, I would feel so terrible about myself, a failure. I began to believe the lie again that I wasn’t worthy. I didn’t like the way God had made me; I was trying to take control of my life. If God was the ultimate leader of my life, why did I have to worry and obsess over the way I looked? I don’t. Song of Songs 4:1a states, “How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful!” God created me. He calls me beautiful. The creator of the entire world calls me beautiful. And for me, that’s enough. Food can no longer be my obsession, but God’s truths are. God can cure my hunger and my obsession with food. No self help book, no therapist, just the almighty God. And honestly, that’s the best person I can have encouraging me to be me.